Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Warmth




We've gotten a lot of nice comments over the last few entries and now as we move into the warm part of the year I can only imagine what a fun time lies over the near horizon. It is heartening to be in the place we are now in our relationship and to read the words of others who are experimenting and thinking about what it means to be in a serious dialogue with what works to keep the fires burning in a modern love. The Founding Father's average marriage lasted about 15 years, mostly because childbirth was a heck of a lot more dangerous to the health of women than it is today. And its no cup of tea today either.
19 years ago VSK and I had a son who only lived for four weeks. And it was during the tough times in the weeks, months and years after losing him that we had to commit to parenthood in a way that many of our fellow marrieds luckily have not had to. I was not so sure I wanted to join the reproductive circus after losing our first child and it was the singular conviction of VSK and her commitment to have kids that taught me the first and most central tenet to our relationship: support her dreams. I have followed VSK for much our time together and its been worth it everytime. I bring a lot of stuff to the table, some of which might be better left on the floor, but by and large what she has is pretty magical and I trust her completely. We have great kids now, and as you can tell we have a pretty great time together.
None of this has come easily or without tremendous willingness on both our parts to struggle forward with what is really inside of us and at the risk of being destroyed to continually evolve and embrace change and growth. For us it was that or die. We fight a bit, but we fight fair. And we learned when we had lost everything that anything that gets you through the day and night is a fair game. Let the summer games begin!

1 comment:

Hank said...

beautiful pic
and words