Going nuclear

I have noticed a tendency in my behavior to take the best things in my life and then turn them into philosophical or political fodder. Too much education I guess. With my wife, no such tendency lies beneath. Its not that she is simply less introspective than I, its just that she has some sort of intuitive knowledge that she would rather leave wordless and I am a slave to symbols. Writing is not my living yet I have gotten paid for it. Watching my wife with other men is not my living, it pays like crap, and I find that philosophically its wonderful. Stop me if I bore you.

As a couple who have yet to go to their first swinger's party, we are not exactly experts in all things "lifestyle." In fact, what I notice the most about folk who are swingers or cuckold husbands, hotwives, poly-whatevers, etc etc, is that no two are alike. What they do have in common is a desire to live outside the nuclear family of politically correct America. And politically they don't want to claim too much for this decision. Rather they just want to share the fun and experiences they have had and maybe get a bit turned on in the process. Or maybe the process of getting turned on requires some fundamental association with the symbolic in order to be a turn-on? Like my wife they care not to be too introspective or claim too much for whatever it is they are experimenting with or have come to love. Wisdom seems to be not to claim that a fuckfest will set you free.

For us, whatever it is, it seems that whenever my love has sex or even flirts hard with another fellow (and women are something I don't think she is fundamentally opposed to fiddling with but no great opportunity has yet arisen) I get a buzz off of her that carries over for a while and puts us both in a happy space. Freaks like us are getting more common as far as I know. Actually I think that they have always been around but now acknowledging them seem less risky. I asked her the other day if she could think of any friend of mine who didn't want to fuck her and she could only pause, think and then smile that it would be hard to name more one or two over the 27 or so years. Look at her ass and know why. Spend more than a couple of minutes around her and even if the ass isn't to your liking the undeniable truth is she just has something beyond words that men want. And its not marriage. I am a lucky guy.